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FunkyJosh>XI<

The baby situation......

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So a few people ask me in game and I was asked on the Zoom meeting and it's difficult for me to physically word without feeling a bit of c**t and a mug. So here it is... 

You all know that I was due to be a father the beginning April of this year, well the girl in question blocked me from contacting her everyway possible then moved house I've been trying for 6 months to get into contact and to find out what is going on and I had no luck. I asked a work buddy to see if he could find her on any social media and he did, The due date of the baby changed to the end of may this year making this an 11th month pregnancy, straight away I knew from this point that this kid wasn't mine but to settle my head we did some more research and thinking looking at the scan photos she had sent to me, the amount of weeks pregnant against the photos did not sum up either with 18 days in between the scan photos one showing hardly anything and then the next showing pretty much a full baby at that point.... Now I know on why I was blocked and now I know why she moved house. It's upset me because of the fact I was lied to that way but at the same time I'm relieved I am out of the Toxic situation with her... This has completely changed my view on growing up and wanting a family as I never want to go through it again for the 3rd time... I hope this breaks it down for you guys. 😔 

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1 hour ago, FunkyJosh>XI< said:

This has completely changed my view on growing up and wanting a family

NO NO NO NO NO

It is the greatest thing you will ever do, you are young have had a few bad experiences, but hey ho we all have. What you need to do is find the right woman, which isn't easy especially today strangely, and she will turn up sometime. I did not get married until I was 32, it not only was the best thing I ever did, but it also probably saved me from a pointless life. 

Think of this as a setback and a lucky escape, get out there buddy, she's looking for you too.

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You're a strong young man. You definitely didn't deserve that. Unfortunately people can be shitty and ruin a part of us. But in life you also learn from mistakes and grow from them. Not every relationship is going to be filled with distrust. Tje right one will come some day. You're still very young and a handsome young chap (haha I've always wanted so say that to someone) so don't let her fk up be on you. Anyways we're all here to support you kiddo. Keep your head up. Lots of XI love. 

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15 minutes ago, Kitsune said:

Also babies are gross anyway, so that's a very loud, shit covered bullet you've also dodged.

What a pity, you are missing the best bit in your life, everyone is different but nothing, and I repeat nothing has tugged at my heartstrings more than being a father, and a grandfather. I would not swap my experiences and the love for no fucking cat, no love there.

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Josh, it takes courage to be vulnerable, and you have shown that courage by opening up and sharing with us, your XI family. Life is made up of lessons, and many are difficult, but it makes us who we are. You learn from the lesson, and move on to bigger and better things. You're a kind, handsome young man, and there is a lot of life left for you to live, and someone special will come your way when you least expect it 💕

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Posted (edited)

a blessing in disguise, count your lucky stars you didn't fall into a loveless  relationship that is only a meal ticket. save your collected data on her for sure will be coming for child support later. A note relationships is like a canoe, for 2 persons are paddling a course, if one changes ......your going in circles.

dust off yourself Funky, you learned a life lesson, givers and takers now go find that special mate and get across  lake to the destination paddling same direction.

Edited by KaptCrunch
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Wow.  Josh, sorry to hear.  I'm happy that you dodged a bullet on that one.  She seems like the true definition of a "C U Next Tuesday".  Family is one of the greatest things you can do with your life.  Don't count it out yet buddy.  You just need to find the right girl.  You never know when or where you may run into her.  But you'll know it when you do.  Give some time for yourself.  Do things that make you happy.  It's usually when you aren't looking, that the magic happens.  Stay Strong my man!!!😎

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OH dear, so so sorry about all this mess you have been dealing with.  Yikes some folks can be really horrible human beings.  Here is what I have to say:

 

1. Condoms, condoms, condoms, do not trust that someone "new" says they are on the pill or whatever, keep yourself safe from lots of trouble.   

2. Date all you want, but if/when you find that special person you adore, who adores you and who you both decide to have a family and be a family with - THEN you marry her.  After your "honeymoon phase" and you know you both want a family, THEN you go for it.  A guy can be a happy great dad at any age, so don't feel like you are in a hurry.  It is the female, to be honest, that has a clock.  I think, for example, George Cluny, age 60 or so, is a happy dad, with a wonderful wife who adores him and they both wanted a family, I think she is in her 40's.   

3. You are a young one.  You have lots of time.  

4. At least for me, being a parent is the best thing ever.  But to have to deal with it as a single parent situation, that would suck and be really, really hard - having to give up your child a lot and not able to be there full time, that would be heart breaking.  Aim for NOT that.   

I hope any of that motherly advice helps dear one.  🥰    Bee yourself, and bee happy!  :animier:

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You dodged a bullet there for sure mate, I'm glad  that you got out of that shitty situation; it could have been worse further down the line.
Keep your head up high mate, keep doing your best and kick some ass. You got me on Steam and I'll reinstall ARMA 2 and 3 when I get the chance (got a new SSD so had to reinstall windows) and come chill out on there with ya if you want.

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Posted (edited)
On 5/3/2021 at 4:10 PM, BlackRose said:

lesson learn,,the hard way as these usually are,,,,when you meet the right person it will all fall in line...🥰🥰

 

Or you never meet the right person and you eventually give up looking and stay home and binge watch Midget Porn on the weekends like I do. 

Edited by J3st3r
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Never give up! you,ll find her when it,s right. life can sure suck sometimes, pick ya self up and move on, she wasn,t worth it to start with if she tells lies like that. I have a friend who did stay with the mum and he just found out his daughter wasn,t his and she is 10,but he signed the birth certificate so he still claims her as his and now fighting in court for her.

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No more words to say other then this .  its simple, I have had the chance to get to know you a little better out of game. And know this, Your a great young man with your whole life in front of you.  Take everything every one said and make it yours.  Learn, Think, motivate , and move forward the way you see fit for your life... Take care of your self before taking care of anybody else....  Don't judge yourself so hard and be open to everything .... Make life fun... keep life simple.. and just understand, Things that hurt us ,Don't destroy us, They just make us stronger and better..

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